| .. |
|
||||
| Being a sex writer isn't always all it's cracked up to be. For
most of us, the pay sucks, if there's pay at all. Talking about
sex incessantly can also have an unexpectedly detrimental effect
on one's own sex life now and then. But there are some notable
perks of the job one can't complain about at all, like opening
your door to find your UPS guy holding a majestically large box
of shiny new toys, sent just for you to play with during work
hours. So, be warned: this may be the most glowing batch of toy
reviews I've ever done. I'm not kissing ass just to keep getting
free toys, I promise (though if it's required, I might consider
it). I just got awfully lucky with this bunch of playthings this
time round. I've been greeting the UPS guy a lot more enthusiastically
ever since, let me tell you. Dragon Pearl It took a few days to bring this one off of my desk and into the bedroom, just because it has so many settings and special, shiny buttons, I couldn't help but press them all day. The smiling dragon face was also just so cheery. Once I finally got the little guy in there, he quickly became one of my all-time favorite toys. Remember all the hubbub about the Rabbit Pearl? I thought it was mostly bullocks, really. The motors die in a blink, and there are a handful of other Japanese vibes that do what it does far better for far longer. Now, this puppy should have the hubbub the rabbit got and then some. What do we have? A smiling silicone purple dragon, for starters, with a lovely little tail. The tail for clit-tickling has five different settings: two constant buzzes, one slower, on faster; a pulse, another pulse -- were we in 4/4 time would be staccato quarter note, staccato quarter note, held half note -- and then a lovely building pulsing vibe that cycles again and again. Very nice. Especially nice when combined with the shaft for penetration, pearls at the base and all, with three settings for spinning. The dragon and I have given an entirely new meaning to the phrase sit and spin with the quality time we've been spending. The quality of this vibe is topnotch, and should you not wish to slay dragons (or be slain by them), it also comes in a fetching mermaid as well. Heck, if you have a partner you could get both and play Lochness Monster plunders the Mermaid, and sing salty sea shanties while you do. Thigh One On, with the Wave in Pink Glitter It should be no big secret at this point that I'm a big fan of Vixen Creations dildos. They're always funky, well-made and incredibly versatile. And in the case of the Wave, pink glitter sparkles really don't hurt. We like sparkles, especially in a nicely wide and gently curved long (but not too), tall glass of silicone. And we REALLY like the Wave in this fantastic, washable (and vegan), neoprene thigh harness. It's easily adjustable, felt great on my end, let me be in charge as the rider, and -- so I was told (aw, shucks) -- set the stage for a very nice show for the wearer to watch. Only yearning I had was to have two, so both the girl and I could strap on, kneel in and catch a thigh ride at the same time. If you're new to harness use and not sure if you'll like it, or feel funny about full-out strapping it on, I'd suggest the thigh harness as a good entry-level tryout. Crystal Wand My friend Zoe was vying for one of these before I got it in the mail. Word to the wise: it's never a bad thing to be pals with a sex writer. So, here's the word from the girl. "You're thinking hard plastic, small in diameter, and shaped like an ancient weapon? Exactly! I have fallen in love (and Zoe doesn't say that sort of thing often). This toy is made for the girl who loves her clit and believes that G-spot stimulus could only improve her time alone. Rock this baby just slightly, from side to side, and there you have it. She-bang! If you aren't sure about your g-spot and like to play with the idea of heat and cold you can always alter its temp. It's a winner on all accounts and it's durable. What more could a girl ask for?" Chocolate and a foot rub afterwards? Echo Ambrosia In short, this is one of the best dildos I have ever used, and I think I'd like to be buried with it. Really. Ambrosia, indeed. It's gorgeous to look at, in a fabulous opalescent sugarplum with deep corkscrew ridges and a nicely tilted head (and I know this sort of thing doesn't just matter to me -- you old queens out there are all thinking how rockin' it'd look on new formica, so you leave me alone). And lemme tell you, girls, I ain't looking' at that lovely color once I feel those ridges and that g-spot tilt. First time I reviewed this (had to try it a few times for good measure, you know) I had one of the most fabulous ejaculation sessions of my life. I even look at this toy now, I get all misty. But there's more: a tiny bullet vibe slips right into the middle of this jobbie. So, you can use it as a vibrator to boot, and what it's got to offer in that regard something like a slimline vibe doesn't is the flexible nature of the thing, so you can do insertion, rocking the base on your clit at the same time. Sweet as the sugar it looks like. Sensa-Touch Wand I get sadistic joy out of taking corporate product into my bedroom and making it nasty. So, I couldn't resist this wand made by Dr. Scholl's. Akin to the Hitachi Wand, this one can operate cordless by charging it in advance, and the charge outlasted me all the times I used it. In general, the big wands aren't my favorite vibrators, I just prefer a more targeted buzz. But as these go, this is a nice one. The whirr isn't too strong or too soft, it's a fairly quiet vibe, and it has three different textures on its head. I liked using it for a warmup before I hit my more intense toys. It also worked wonders on a sore calf muscle, which is the sort of thing it's supposed to be used for (yeah, right). It never hurts to have a vibe around you can also use in a g-rated fashion. Especially when traveling. If your bag gets security-checked, you get to pretend to be all offended and say, "Gawd! It's just a muscle massager!" Hey, you have to have something to look forward to at the airport these days besides getting felt up. Good Lubrications This new lube from Good Vibrations and the makers of Astroglide rocks my socks. It's glycerin-free, so for those of you out there prone to the icky yeasties, it's a great one. Its taste is completely nonoffensive (let's face it, no one wants to see a partner making the sour-squishy face between your legs), and it gives great slip-and-slide that lasts. |
|||||
|
12.07.06: Scarlet Letters -- in case it isn't glaringly obvious -- is currently
on an extended hiatus. The web has changed, we've changed, and
we're trying to figure out how we both fit together now, which isn't a process we want to rush. If you're looking for more current SL-related content, you can
have check out upcoming books from editor Heather Corinna and previous co-editor Hanne Blank, check out Heather's current sexuality sites, or explore sites through the femmerotic network. We hope to be back with you soon, as fresh, challenging and
unexpected as ever.
In the meantime, by all means, enjoy our years of past content,
all of which still remain in the public and subscription areas.
| .. | visual art • prose & poetry • nonfiction • artists in residence • archive • home |
