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<TD ALIGN="LEFT"><B>Transpersonal: When Sex Is a Drag</B></TD>
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<TD ALIGN="RIGHT"><B><FONT FACE="Georgia"><A HREF="bios_a2l.shtml#Kaldera">Raven Kaldera</A> </FONT></B></TD>
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<P><I><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Part 1: Performing Gender </FONT></I></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">In <I>To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar</I>, American viewers were treated to a small gang of drag queens
who were lovingly adopted by a wholesome Middle-America village
and defended from homophobic police. It was intended to be a film
that would humanize drag queens, making them into something a
little more cute and cuddly and socially acceptable. Of course,
part of this euphemizing process meant that their sex lives were
completely invisible. One is shown flirting with a straight boy
who thinks she's an ordinary girl, but then she is diverted by
her companions before a <I>Crying Game</I>-type scene can ruin the comedy. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">A friend who watched the film - a straight but open-minded man
who had never actually met a drag queen in his life - drew this
discrepancy to my attention. He said, "They're very sympathetic,
but you can't help but sit there and wonder what they do in bed.
Do they act like women in bed, or men, or what? The more the movie
skirts around it, the more you wonder." For him, and for others,
the attempts to desexualize the queens actually called attention
to their mysterious sex lives. Even when the media plays down
the steamy aspect, we as a society can't seem to keep our minds
off it. What do they do? And how do they think of themselves when
they do it? </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Drag kings and queens are not a monolithic whole, and they define
themselves differently. Some are simply men or women who enjoy
performing an opposite-sex character as a dramatic art form once
in a while, and their performance never even sideswipes their
personal lives; others are only a few steps away from being transsexuals,
and their cross-gender identity may be more important and vibrant
than their mundane "work gender". This is reflected in their preferred
treatment while in drag. Some, like D.C. area performer Jymmie
James, will calmly announce onstage that he is a gay man, and
this is part of his gender expression. Others are militant about
being called by their drag name and pronoun from the second that
their costume or makeup goes on, and become irate when people
slip up. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Similarly, their sexual preferences in and out of drag are equally
varied. There's an assumption that drag queens, in general, ought
probably to prefer to have sex as women, or porn-style "she-males".
After all, people reason, since gender is all tied up with sex,
then cross-gender dressing must be sexual in nature, so why dress
up like that unless you wanted to be the opposite sex in bed?
Of course, in real life, it's never that simple. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">One gay drag queen that I spoke to strongly refuted this idea.
"When I'm Stefani," s/he stressed, "it's a performance. It's not
about wanting to be a woman. It's not even about being gay, except
that gay men are the only ones given permission to perform female
roles. It's not sexual; I never have sex as Stefani. When I want
to fuck, I take off the clothes and the makeup and fuck with men,
as Steve." S/he admits, however, that being Stefani periodically
does affect hir love life: "Some men won't approach me because
they assume that I'll want to be Stefani in bed, and they prefer
men, not trannies; others approach me hoping that they can lift
my skirt and screw me, and I'll just be a chick-with-a-dick for
them. They're usually disappointed." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Another drag queen had a different take on the matter. "I wanted
to experiment with having sex as Gabrielle," s/he reported, "so
I found a guy who was bisexual and married, a big ex-Marine; I
figured that was as close to straight as I could get with someone
who'd still have sex with me. He was very cool, and agreed to
do this experiment with me. First I had sex with him as Gabrielle,
and then he sat in a chair as I removed each piece of Gabrielle's
accoutrements - the wig, the dress, the makeup, the fingernails
- and I had him report how his attraction to me changed at every
step. Then, when I was stripped, we had sex with me as Darin.
It was incredibly affirming." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Shayla, a gay drag queen, has "separate sex lives for both sides
of myself. With my long-term partner, I'm Kirk; but Shayla has
her own lovers, and yes, we fuck in drag." Kirk/Shayla found that
his sexual tastes are split along gendered lines: "It's interesting
because Kirk and Shayla have entirely different sexual patterns.
It's not as simple as 'Kirk likes to fuck, and Shayla likes to
be fucked'. As Kirk, I'm sensitive to my partner's needs, and
we communicate a lot; it's much more loving. When I'm Shayla,
all I want to do is get done the way I want to get done. I'm an
absolute slut, and I insist on getting my needs met. My female
side isn't a traditionally feminine doormat, she's more like a
bitchy dragon lady. And, of course, Kirk and Shayla attract entirely
different types of men." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Jasmine/Jon, another drag queen, agrees. "Jon wouldn't touch anyone
who wasn't a fag, but Jasmine tends to get turned on to straight
guys. This probably would have gotten me killed already if I didn't
restrain myself. When I'm Jasmine for several hours, I can get
so deeply into the illusion that I forget what's under my skirts,
and for about a minute, I think to myself, 'Why can't I hit on
that nice straight man over there?' Then I come to my senses and
slap myself around mentally. Yet I don't really want a sex change.....because
it's easier to live as Jon, and he's really better at coping with
everyday life. And I like being Jon, too; I don't want to have
to give that up." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Thistle, a bisexual man who does "hootchie drag", finds it "somewhat
sordid in one way and incredibly liberating in another, because
men don't get much chance to be viewed as a beautiful mysterious
sex object." He says that, "when I'm in drag I can flirt shamelessly....I
know how to attract men much better as a girl than a guy....When
I'm with a woman, I feel most comfortable and free and honest
expressing myself....talking about fashion, surfaces, gossip,
being sensitive and vulnerable.... However, sadly, I find that
only a certain small group of bisexual women are attracted to
this sort of thing, and even fewer feminine men, which is the
main reason I am re-exploring my masculine side." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Natasha, who is "mostly Nathan, but still Natasha on occasion",
reports that she "got burnt out on sex as Natasha after being
a sex worker for two years. All the guys wanted to do was bend
me over a table and fuck me. At first it was great, because I
had wanted that, but eventually I couldn't take it that no one
was willing to see me as the whole person I am, and want Nathan
as well as Natasha. After I quit the sex bars, I didn't do Natasha
for three years. Now I can do drag again, I can even have sex
as Natasha again, but only with someone who was lovers with me
as Nathan first, who I can trust to love both parts of me." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Others find that their drag persona, not their everyday persona,
is the sticking point with lovers. Drake Blackstone, a drag king
with the Imperial Court and the American Boyz Drag King Liaison,
says: "Putting on boy stuff is always sexually charged, but it
doesn't make me jerk off and come. So in that aspect it's not
a fetishization. When I'm in drag in public, I'm hypervigilant,
paying attention to all my mannerisms, so of course everything
is very intense. There's a very exhibitionistic side to this -
why else would you spend all that time and money on costume to
perform for three minutes! Talk about a quick whack-off! And then
you sit in the glow for days.......When it comes to the bedroom,
drag performing must have a sexual aspect to it, only logically.
Performing is sexually charged for me, but that's similar to what
musicians express about the performance high. It's similar to
if not better than orgasm. I'm sexually charged, even horny, after
a peformance. I've never had sex in full drag, though, because
I like to be naked when I'm having sex - skin contact is very
important - and drag is restrictive in that way." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">He points out the ambivalent boundary between the identity of
the drag performer and the identity of the persona: "Drake Blackstone
is my performance name, to make it easier for people to visualize
who they are talking to when it comes to gender. They're really
talking, of course, to the same person. When I'm performing, I'm
more conscious of my moves and manners and speech, but Drake is
about putting forth the male in me, because in truth I am not
so much a drag performer as a wereguy. During certain cycles of
the year, I feel more masculine in presentation than feminine,
and my drag persona is a healthy and safe venue for this." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">As a member of the Imperial Court, Drake calles himself "a king
among queens. The politics of drag queens are entirely different
from the politics of drag kings; most kings come out of the lesbian
community, and they consider themselves dykes. Some are butch,
and have sex the way butches have sex - which spans a broad spectrum
from dysphoric 'stone' to ordinary 'lesbian sex as a woman with
women' to 'practically an FTM transsexual'. Others don't see themselves
as butch at all, just as women who perform, and their sexuality
happens when the clothes come off. And then there are drag kings
like me who aren't lesbian - I'm bisexual and I've never been
part of the women's community - whose sexuality is much less lesbian-identified
and much more fluid." </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">At IDKE (the International Drag King Extravaganza) it was pointed
out that drag kings fill an important function for lesbians, who
may feel too bound up with political correctness and female programming
to be entirely comfortable with the free and unexamined flow of
sexuality: drag kings provide a safe way to sexually objectify
both women and masculinity, without either offending women or
involving oneself with actual men. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Of course, there are a certain number of drag performers who do
eventually cross the boundary into transsexualism, starting to
take hormones and transition. In some drag communities, they are
allowed to keep performing; in others, they are pressured to retire,
as they aren't "really" drag performers any more. Drag queens
tend to be more lenient about this sort of thing than kings, probably
because the changes wrought by testosterone are so dramatic. One
individual laughingly referred to drag as his "gateway drug".
Although drag performers in general seem reluctant to talk about
drag in relation to their sexuality, there does seem to be a widespread
suspicion that the ones who tend to have sex more often as their
personas than as their ordinary selves - and prefer it that way
- are the ones who are more "at risk" for suddenly deciding to
get sex changes. A kinder way to put it was that these are the
ones whose drag is a coping mechanism for real dysphoria, not
just a fun performance of gender, and eventually they decide it
isn't enough and more extreme measures are needed. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Some of these folks do leave the drag community entirely when
they transition; others find unique ways to remain in it. One
famous drag king transitioned to male and then retired as a drag
performer, but still emcees for occasional shows. Another heterosexual
female drag king transitioned to become a gay male, and then decided
that he ought to be allowed to be a gay drag queen, and came back
into the community in that capacity. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Drag is an ambivalent balance beam of genderplay. Some see it
as a highly political act - challenging and reframing what gender
roles are supposed to be. Others, doing it more for deeply personal
reasons of identity (or as just plain fun), are confused by this
politicization and would prefer to be seen as unique performers
rather then as part of a "movement". There is a lot of unrest
between these camps, and sexual tension is part of that. There's
a great deal of effort gone to by those who would politicize drag
to separate it entirely from the phenomenon of fetishistic cross-dressing
(dealt with in the next TransPersonal column), as they fear that
would demean and belittle the socially challenging aspects, getting
it merely thrown into an inconsequential category of "more weird
stuff those queer sexual perverts are doing". Of course, the fact
that drag is still so strongly identified with the gay and/or
lesbian communities doesn't help, as those communities are still
seen by the outside world as being defined by the sort of sex
people are having (or at least who they're having it with), despite
all efforts to make it less about sex and more about "lifestyle".
</FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">However, it's also slowly becoming more mainstream, which may
create not only a greater audience but a greater variety of performers,
including their range of sexual expression. There is a new phenomenon
of "bioqueens"; biological women who dress as drag queens (such
as the infamous Princesses of Porn) and perform alongside drag
kings. There are "transkings" and "transqueens"; post-transition
transsexuals who are demanding their right to keep performing
in their communities of origin. There are more heterosexual and
bisexual drag performers demanding to be heard. </FONT></P>
<P><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">Can we imagine a world where any dramatic or performance piece
could be played by anyone who could manage the makeup and a realistic
appearance, regardless of their actual gender? With modern special-effects
cosmetics, it's not hard to transform people into the other gender
- witness <I>Mrs. Doubtfire</I> and other cross-dressing movies. What would it be like if the
only barrier to any person playing any part wasn't their looks
or bodies, but the quality of their makeup? If actors had separate
"drag personas" to play cross-gender parts in movies and TV? Think
about it. Someday, the future may look a lot like that. </FONT></P>
<P><I><FONT FACE="Georgia" SIZE="2">(Part 1 of this 2-part article focuses on on the sexualities of
gender performers - drag kings and queens. Part 2 will concentrate
on the cross-dressing phenomenon.) </FONT></I></TD>
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